EPUB télécharger Hikaru No Go 12 Author Takeshi Obata May 2008

I often get emails from women who strongly suspect that their husbands or boyfriends are cheating but they have no solid evidence to back up these suspicions.  I often hear comments like: “I know that he’s cheating on me, but I have nothing to prove this.  How can I get him to confess?;” or ” How can I prove to him that he should just admit the cheating so that we can move on? It’s insulting to me for him to keep pretending that we don’t both know what’s happening.”  I’ll address these concerns, as well as methods to get the proof that you need, in the following article.

Proof Is Often The Only Way To Really Get Him To Admit The Cheating: As women we often fantasize that he will be over come with guilt or morality and will just feel the need to get this all off his chest and then to beg for our forgiveness.  Or, he’ll decide that he doesn’t feel anything or want anything from the other woman, will cut all ties with her, and then confess what he’s done as way to start over with a perfectly clean slate. 

Unfortunately, this is rarely the reality as it exists.  Men know that we are going to react in a pretty bad way and that there are going to be some severe consequences to these actions and they want to avoid all of that.  That’s why they have been so secretive about this in the first place.  If they wanted to bring all of these things out into the light and hash them out, they would’ve done that before they resulted to cheating and then hid it.  So, thinking that you are going to be able to say some magic words that appeal to his sense of decency is likely unrealistic. It’s often quite too late for this.

Sure, you can try telling him that you’re going to act as if he’s already confessed so that he no longer has any pay off for continuing to lie.  Or, you can vow to deal with this together and work through this if he would just come clean. I am sure that this would work on some men with a very high moral compass and it certainly doesn’t hurt to try, but make no mistake.  Proof is king.  And there are a lot of ways to get it.

Getting The Proof You Need To Get Him To Admit He’s Being Unfaithful: There are many clues that a cheating man will leave behind.  The first place to look is often his cell phone.  Everyone uses this device today instead of a land line.  You can start by checking his photos, call log, and messaging in box.  Most men are not stupid enough to not delete these things, but there is software that can undo his delete. And, you can often find a call log that will give you a number without a name. If that number is reoccurring at questionable hours, you can do a reverse phone look up to see exactly who this person is.  If you wish to scope this out in person for yourself, you can then obtain the address through a variety of reverse look ups or public information.  I would advise caution here though.  Once you cross this line, there is no going back and often this confrontation is quite painful and puts the focus on them rather than on you.  Often we hope that it is going to make us feel better but it really only hurts us more.

Another place that you may want to check out is his car because he will often use this to transport the other woman while they are spending time together.  You can often find some evidence here, but often he will play this off like these things belong to a coworker or a friend who he gave a lift.  If this is the case, just use this as more information to point you toward the proof that is going to seal the deal.  This just confirms for you that you are on the right track and should keep right on digging.

You will also want to check his computer.  Now, many men will have several email accounts so that they don’t have to mingle their cheating with your shared or known email. And, sometimes they will change their password so that you can’t get in.  Again, there is software that will tell you exactly what is happening on the computer without needing the personal information or passwords.  You can go in every chat room, every email account, and every IM that has been visited and see exactly what has taken place. 

I often prefer this second hand digging to a face to face confrontation or to following them (you can know exactly where they are via GPS tracking so that you don’t get caught) because this allows you to know what you are dealing with before hand and it allows you to confront him face to face and alone without the other woman there confusing things and making the situation more volatile.  Because this is between the two of you.  I believe that you deserve his undivided attention when you present your proof.  You shouldn’t have to (and likely wouldn’t want to) deal with her presence while you are dealing with this upsetting issue to which you absolutely deserve answers straight from him.

I was in this same situation a short time ago. I tried to comfront my husband with my suspicions of his cheating, but I didn’t have the proof so he continued to lie right to my face. I decided that I really wanted to know the truth, no matter what that truth was. I learned how to get concrete information and proof that my husband thought that he had hid and erased. Once I presented this to him, he had no choice but to come clean. You can read my very personal story at http://catch-the-cheating.com/.